5 Kinds Of Employees You Need To Fire

“I don’t think it can work between us anymore.” 

A trademark line when the main protagonist of the show loses a job to put his family already going through dire circumstances under further turmoil. Trust me, not all such conversations are heavy on the heart and can stop you to give your employee a termination letter. I have had a few myself, and based on personal experiences if you have a good enough reason to fire someone, you won’t feel guilty when you pass him behind a tikki-chaat counter even if it comes to that. I have come across a few interesting personalities in the past. I am sure that most of our readers will admit being one and yet surviving the wrath of their seniors in the workplace. Here we have put together a list of the various personality types who are better out of the office than in. 

1. The Procrastinator

Procrastination Aasaanjobs fire

I have never come across better planners in my life. All they do during the day is to procrastinate what task is more significant than the other. They maintain all sorts of to-do lists in amazing colors and styles. But the problem is that the lists get never struck through.Such employees should be given letter of termination immediately. How do you let them know something is wrong? Give them a clean board and ask them to list down tasks taken to accomplishment. Boom! The job is done.

2. The Break Guy

Break guy Aasaanjobs fire

This breed socialises with almost every guy in the office – from the office boy to his manager whether it be a sutta, coffee, chai or loo break. The only place to not find this guy is his desk. And everybody in the office would come to defend when his ass is on fire. When we called for a guy’s login, he had been out 16 times in a single day. Need I say more or give that employee a termination letter?

3. The Redundant Guy

Redundant Aasaanjobs fire

With the advent of technology, all our lives have turned better except for this guy. Poor guy slogged all his life for the firm, performed tedious manual tasks with tenacity and then one day an evil genius killed his living via an invention. These conversations are generally emotional in nature. You can give the guy all the reasons and calculations in this world on the board that technology shall prove more profitable for the firm, but you want to be the last person in the office telling this guy to go with a letter of termination in hand.

4. The Whiner

Whiner Aasaanjobs
The first time he came to your office he seemed like a genuine guy who had concerns about his job role. Then he came the next day. And the day after. Suddenly a realization hits you that this guy lives to whine. He will whine about his colleagues coming late to the office, being asked to work overtime and even you not being motivating enough for him as a leader. You have to just wait for public support to push this case to HR because anything too outrageous might make you a boss who is unwilling to think about the welfare of his employees.

5. The Guy Who Stole Your Office Crush

Stealing your boss's girl Aasaanjobs fire

This guy just has to go. No, you don’t need a reason. You just need the words reaching your ear that this guy was seen curling her hair. All your business hours – and that of your loyalists – are engaged in brainstorming strategies over chat to boot this unscrupulous gentleman out of this office for his indecent acts maligning the office atmosphere. All CCTVs focusing on his computer screen like a microscope to catch him browsing a social networking website or check the score at halftime for the Champions League final. What follows is a barrage of emails to HR, who have no other way out but giving him a termination letter.

Beware: Once the rumour reaches her ears, she might be on the way out as well.

That’s all folks. Please be nice to all your employees and do not try to fit them in one of the above frames to squeeze them out. 

However, if matters go out of hand and you find yourself out of employees to run your organisation, do consider visiting the Aasaanjobs website to hire quality assessed candidates.


Also published on Medium.

facelessgypsy

'Won't give it back' is Vaibhav's motto of life, with the 'it' being open to interpretation (XBox joystick more often than not). Vaibhav works as a Product Manager at AJ.

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1 Response

  1. January 12, 2016

    […] Getting fired is an experience one would best not have. Sometimes it just hits you out of nowhere, while you are going about your life blissfully unaware of the ominous signs. At other times, it’s just there – a clear, distinct writing on the wall. […]